Last week I was privileged enough to spend some time volunteering at an orphanage here in Daegu. After contacting the orphanage via email to enquire as to volunteering opportunities I was invited to attend their annual Christmas party for games, pizza, carols and a movie.
To be honest I really didn’t know what to expect. I had no idea of their ages or individual circumstances or even what sort of organization the orphanage was. On Saturday afternoon I arrived at Ansim station where I met Todd, who is heavily involved with the orphanage and the local church. We also met several of the other volunteers and then headed over to the orphanage.
The building itself is located on the outskirts of Daegu in what appears to be a much lower socio-economic part of town. Slightly run down, it may have been a school in a former life although it is difficult to tell. It is in a slightly industrial area, which no doubt ensures a reasonable level of rent (assuming any is paid of course) and fronts onto a large and dusty outdoor recreation area and car park.
The kids were shy at first but quickly warmed up to the new faces – even the quietest of them were running around like lunatics and begging for piggyback rides. It was great to see their personalities coming out, as there were some rather nervous looking kids when we first arrived. Members of the local church began to trickle in throughout the afternoon along with local Korean teachers who also volunteer at the orphanage – some even living there full time to help care for the kids. The relationships between these teachers and church members appeared very strong and it was clear that these are very important people in their lives. After meeting with a lot of them and speaking to them you can’t help but wonder if these kids are in a better place now than they ever have been. The volunteers I spoke with were all kind, generous, intelligent, cheerful and infinitely patient. What better role models could you ask for given the circumstances?
Throughout the afternoon we played games, watched some performances by the kids and even staged a performance of our own. After carol time Santa made an appearance and gave each of the children a present which they were absolutely thrilled with. One of the little boys received a remote-controlled toy car which went down an absolute treat. He stopped playing with only long enough to jam a couple of pieces of pizza into his mouth before resuming ramming it into peoples ankles and mastering the art of the wheelie.
The kids were shy at first but quickly warmed up to the new faces – even the quietest of them were running around like lunatics and begging for piggyback rides. It was great to see their personalities coming out, as there were some rather nervous looking kids when we first arrived. Members of the local church began to trickle in throughout the afternoon along with local Korean teachers who also volunteer at the orphanage – some even living there full time to help care for the kids. The relationships between these teachers and church members appeared very strong and it was clear that these are very important people in their lives. After meeting with a lot of them and speaking to them you can’t help but wonder if these kids are in a better place now than they ever have been. The volunteers I spoke with were all kind, generous, intelligent, cheerful and infinitely patient. What better role models could you ask for given the circumstances?
Throughout the afternoon we played games, watched some performances by the kids and even staged a performance of our own. After carol time Santa made an appearance and gave each of the children a present which they were absolutely thrilled with. One of the little boys received a remote-controlled toy car which went down an absolute treat. He stopped playing with only long enough to jam a couple of pieces of pizza into his mouth before resuming ramming it into peoples ankles and mastering the art of the wheelie.
One little boy was absolutely adorable, and it broke my heart to think that someone out there simply didn’t want him, or his seven year old sister who was also at the orphanage. Apparently his parents split up and decided that neither of them wanted the kids so they simply gave them to the orphanage and moved on. He was a dear little boy with a very laid back and adaptable personality. At only 20 months old it was both fortunate and sad that he was so comfortable in the presence of so many strangers – whether this is testament to his personality or his unstable upbringing I do not know. His sister seemed very much the same – a very pretty little girl who was friendly and eager to participate in everything from singing to games to cleaning up afterwards.
Mi Young - aged 20 months
Oh boy, a present from Santa!
Looking at these kids it was hard to believe that some of them have had such turbulent pasts. I have no idea of the backgrounds of most of them, but for the most part the parents have generally split up and decided that neither of them wants to take the children. Or, in a number of cases the children have been left with the mother who is often young and generally unable to support them financially. A very sad situation indeed and one I find difficult to understand, particularly given some rather contradictory aspects of Korean culture.
On one hand, Korea is a very harmonious and collective culture and it could be argued that they look after their families far better than the majority of western countries. On the other hand, Korea is also a culture built on social hierarchies: where respect and obedience is critical to maintaining social harmonies. Any deviation from the expected social plan (i.e. school, university, marriage, children, and career) is considered shameful, particularly where children are concerned.
To be an unmarried mother in Korea is considered immoral and deplorable. These mothers are considered to be the lowest rung on the societal ladder, are socially ostracized and often alienated from their own families as a result. Unwed mothers are regularly turned down for jobs. There is no getting around this, as to not disclose this fact will only lead to accusations of dishonesty and termination of their contracts. The government takes a similar view – children born out of wedlock are entitled to only around US$45 a month in support. Korean children adopted into Korean families are entitled to US$85 a month. Incredible when you think how much money the government must give in order to subsidize the large number of orphanages throughout the country.
The government is trying to increase financial benefits for unmarried mothers but social stigma is proving to be a huge barrier. Nobody will come forward to claim these benefits – they would sooner have an illegal abortion or have their child in secret and relinquish it to an orphanage rather than face a lifetime of stigma at the hands of general society.
More recently, Korea’s first unwed mothers support network has been established – the first of its kind in the country. It is incredible to think that a country would sooner ostracize members of society and adopt its children internationally rather than provide the necessary support for women who genuinely need it. With any luck this organization (and future organizations) will, in time, help to remove - or at least lessen - the stigma of unmarried mothers. In turn, the need for so many orphanages will no longer exist and the lives of so many women and children will not be so miserable. We can but hope.
If you want to read more on this topic I recommend checking out this article – a fascinating insight from both an unwed mother and a Korean adoptee. This is also a great article – a little older, but the sentiments and attitudes it speaks of are still rife in Korea. Older still but equally as fascinating is this piece from the South China Morning Post (20/06/98) which refers to some orphans as ‘IMF orphans’, in reference to the IMF’s Korean bailout back in 1997 which was blamed by many for the economic downturn.
Me – I have signed up to volunteer regularly at the orphanage as an English teacher and as a general lackey. These kids need and deserve every opportunity in life and if I can do just a tiny little bit to help it’s got to count for something. Besides – who doesn’t relish the opportunity to be a big kid once in a while?
On one hand, Korea is a very harmonious and collective culture and it could be argued that they look after their families far better than the majority of western countries. On the other hand, Korea is also a culture built on social hierarchies: where respect and obedience is critical to maintaining social harmonies. Any deviation from the expected social plan (i.e. school, university, marriage, children, and career) is considered shameful, particularly where children are concerned.
To be an unmarried mother in Korea is considered immoral and deplorable. These mothers are considered to be the lowest rung on the societal ladder, are socially ostracized and often alienated from their own families as a result. Unwed mothers are regularly turned down for jobs. There is no getting around this, as to not disclose this fact will only lead to accusations of dishonesty and termination of their contracts. The government takes a similar view – children born out of wedlock are entitled to only around US$45 a month in support. Korean children adopted into Korean families are entitled to US$85 a month. Incredible when you think how much money the government must give in order to subsidize the large number of orphanages throughout the country.
The government is trying to increase financial benefits for unmarried mothers but social stigma is proving to be a huge barrier. Nobody will come forward to claim these benefits – they would sooner have an illegal abortion or have their child in secret and relinquish it to an orphanage rather than face a lifetime of stigma at the hands of general society.
More recently, Korea’s first unwed mothers support network has been established – the first of its kind in the country. It is incredible to think that a country would sooner ostracize members of society and adopt its children internationally rather than provide the necessary support for women who genuinely need it. With any luck this organization (and future organizations) will, in time, help to remove - or at least lessen - the stigma of unmarried mothers. In turn, the need for so many orphanages will no longer exist and the lives of so many women and children will not be so miserable. We can but hope.
If you want to read more on this topic I recommend checking out this article – a fascinating insight from both an unwed mother and a Korean adoptee. This is also a great article – a little older, but the sentiments and attitudes it speaks of are still rife in Korea. Older still but equally as fascinating is this piece from the South China Morning Post (20/06/98) which refers to some orphans as ‘IMF orphans’, in reference to the IMF’s Korean bailout back in 1997 which was blamed by many for the economic downturn.
Me – I have signed up to volunteer regularly at the orphanage as an English teacher and as a general lackey. These kids need and deserve every opportunity in life and if I can do just a tiny little bit to help it’s got to count for something. Besides – who doesn’t relish the opportunity to be a big kid once in a while?
Singing Christmas carols in English
Having a treat - Dunkin' Donuts in the playhouse
Rugrat central
The Christmas feast put on by the orphanage
One of the evening's Christmas performances
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